To be Grateful… or is Bitching Better??…

Hmm… trying to be grateful is really difficult when there are so many problems and issues in the world.  I am thinking that this blog would be better served towards blowing off steam and bitching about the stupid kretins who cause issues in the world….

Let me start with an issue that causes me much grief… stupid people on buses.

Why is it that some people can stand around waiting for a bus, but they may no attempt to get their bus fare or their concession card ready until they get on the bus.  Do they ever think about other people.  All of the passengers on the bus have to wait for these kretins (usually women), as they mince about in their purse looking for coins, while the rest of us watch and see the next light turning red.  I had a most unfortunate experience on the weekend, as I was running late and needed to get into the city quickly.  This big group of really stupid girls must have been waiting for the bus for over 10 minutes, but none of them had their 80c ready when the bus came along.  We spent about 5 minutes waiting for them to fumble around in their handbags to find their concession card, and another 5 minutes for them to locate some money.  I just can’t wait until they mandate the prepay system on Sydney buses.  Make these stupid people walk I say!!

When you get onto a bus, some people think they own particular seats in the bus, particularly when they take an aisle seat, and they put their shopping bags near the window!  How rude.  It really makes you want to do a fit smelly fart in their face as u are standing in the aisle!! They should walk as well as the stupid people who don’t get their bus money ready before they get on the bus.

The Janette Howard Cup Cake Conspiracy

I am grateful that I am able to see through the perils of modern life.  It is clear to me that there is a plot to trick the people of Sydney by making them eat cup cakes that contain love potion that make us vote for John Howard.

John Howard has gone up by 1% in the opinion polls this week.  And I also noticed that every second shop in Sydney is selling cup cakes.  Chance or coincidence??? I think not!! These cup cakes have mysteriously appeared after the APEC summit, when the streets of Sydney were barricaded off - we thought this was for the APEC Summit, but I think there was a more frightening motive…  

Janette Howard is clearly a woman who is going to lead Australian women into the 1950’s – and what was big in the 1950s – CUP CAKES.  During APEC, it’s obvious to me that Janette led a brigade of cup cake warriors around every shop in the city – and these cup cakes were laced with John Howard love juice… just be grateful that you didn’t need to milk Johnny’s love juice… poor old Janette!!

Suddenly, after the APEC summit, everyone is selling cup cakes.  Cup cakes in the shape of the Opera House, cup cakes with flags, cup cakes in the shape of Nauru, cup cakes with little uranium stickers and the Indian flag…  Cup cakes all over the place.  But let me try to think back to my childhood…. cup cakes are white trash food, and I haven’t eaten one since a BBQ along the Georges River back in 1991.  What is possessing people to eat them now, at $4 a pop I might add!!  There is nothing else to eat for morning tea in the city, as Janette forced every shop in the city into stocking them when they closed up for APEC!!  In the city, it’s cup cakes or nothing!

And now we suddenly have an opinion poll where John Howard goes up by 1%.  Clearly 1% of people must have eaten some cup cakes in the city this week.  They are laced with John Howard love juice, courtesy of Jannette!!!  I’m just grateful that I didn’t eat any cup cakes this week, and I look forward to the time when cup cakes go out of fashion.  Bring back yo-yo’s!!

Centennial Park

Today was a rather boring day of tedious repetitiveness.  Monday morning as a 36y.o. student involves the following:

- 5:58 a.m. – Waking up as the cat is licking my scalp (I do not have a bald spot) - I could do a link to the Bureau of Meteorology as this is the time that the sun breaks over the horizon – time for the cat to be fed

- 5:59 a.m. – Push cat away

- 6:00 a.m. – Ponder whether I will be prosecuted by the RSPCA because I use hair products that probably contain lots of hazardous chemicals, and my cat will be poisoned by licking my head;

- 6:04 a.m. – Wake up again to the sound of the cat purring in my ear.

- 6:05 a.m. – Feed cat. Go back to bed.

- 6:06 a.m. – Reflect on people who are getting up to go to work, as it is Monday morning. Appreciate their service to the economy, and wonder briefly if they are happy about going to work on Monday morning.  Wonder if they are motivated and wonder about what they might achieve this week, apart from being able to pay their mortgages – wonder if being able to pay your mortgage can be classed as an achievement.

- 6:07 a.m. – Go back to sleep.

- 10:13 a.m. – Wake up and realise that it is still really early.  Slumber time.

- 10:36 a.m. – Wake up and get breakfast.  Tell myself that I will study today.

- 11 a.m. – Study (shock horror).

- 3pm – head off for a cycle around Centennial Park.  This is the grateful bit of my diary today – it’s amazing how some people back in 1888 decided that they would devote a huge area of land for a park, only 4km from the city.  Centennial Park was planned nearly 125 years ago, and these people would have just had a dream to create a place for people to go for a walk or run – they were thinking long term.  I wonder if they ever thought whether I would go for a cycle in 2007.  This really makes me think about the decisions that the people of 2007 are making today – do we often think about our great great great grandchildren in the year 2135, and how they will live their life??  I would love to imagine someone living in 2135, having the opportunity to walk or cycle around Centennial Park.  Experiencing the fresh cold breeze that I felt today, seeing the ducks run across the road as I nearly ran them over.  But I sometimes wonder if most people today just think about their mortgage, their ipod without having time to smell the roses.   Not a good way to make people happy in 2135.

Anyway I’m grateful for Centennial Park…

Meat

Caught up with mum and dad on the weekend, as it is a while since we last caught up.  They insisted on going to the Marconi Club – it was quite a trek out there.  After having contended with 90 minutes of traffic through areas where you lock the doors of your car, I finally arrived, very late for lunch.  The biggest event in that area of Sydney is the meat tray raffle at the Marconi Club.  Somehow, I just had a preminition that I was gonna win, so I bought a few tickets.  And I did win… gotta be grateful for that.

I’m also grateful that my freezer was fairly empty, as I now have enough meat to last about a month.  Maybe this is a sign that I should have a BBQ, now that summer is round the corner….

Cramming. 36yo people can still do it.

Bit of a crappy post today…. I am grateful that my brain is still able to cram useless information for the purpose of passing pointless exams at uni. 

I have been off line for the last couple of days, as I had an exam today.  It was on the utterly enthralling topic of Environmental Auditing – are you asleep yet??  As I did not make any effort to take any interest in the subject in the past six weeks, the last couple of days have been slightly stressful.  As a topic of interest, Environmental Auditing ranks somewhere between watching paint dry and watching Big Brother.  

It’s amazing how you can cram so much useless shit into your head, just for the purpose of spurting it all out in exams.  I feel like I am back at school, as this is the first uni exam I have had where it was not open book.  I am trying to think of a situation in life where you would not be able to refer to a text book or other papers when you are doing Environmental Auditing.  I have no reason to do some auditing of icebergs as they fall off the edge of Antarctica – I think I will always be able to refer to a text book in my future life as an Environmental Auditor – so what is the bloody point of having exams where you can’t refer to a text book?? 

I think your ability to cram information into your head gets better as you get older, but I am not sure of the reason.  Maybe there is a future PhD topic in that somewhere for someone… 

Underground Toxic Waste Cloud Has A Silver Lining

Well, I’ve not been able to provide any grateful diary entries this week, as I went down to Melbourne with JL to escape the APEC kerfuffle.  Not that we were ungrateful to be in Melbourne.  The weather was nice so we just hung out in cafes, caught up with Brad (the other gay in the family) and did lots of other Melbourne things, including wingeing about Sydney.

I have been having problems with getting information for a uni assignment that I have to do on contaminated sites.  The question outlines a scenario where petrol has been leaking into residential areas. 

As it turns out, this has recently happened in a suburb of Melbourne, and there was a big article on this problem in “The Age” on the weekend:  http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/leaked-petrol-contaminates-suburb/2007/09/08/1188783562165.html.  It seems amazing to me that petrol can leak out of a pipeline into a residential area for two years, and no one does anything about it.  It has even got into the groundwater.  Anyway, in terms of my assignment, it’s quite lucky that I went to Melbourne after all…..  

CityRail Mobile Gyms to Blacktown-by-the-Sea (Central Coast)

Went to dinner with Leanne tonight and we came up with a brainwave idea to revitalize CityRail in addition to streamlining the waistline of people who live on the Central Coast (Blacktown-by-the-Sea). 

We reckon that CityRail should build some special trains that have a gym in them, as it is over an hour from the Central Coast to the city.  This is dead time.  Currently all these people probably read books or just look out the window while listening to their Ipod.  It must be very difficult for them to get to the gym if they work in Sydney…. but imagine if CityRail had a special train that was a gym.  They could work out on the way down the coast, with lots of nice views over the Hawkesbury River etc etc.  CityRail could also make some extra cash by charging $10 per visit, as apparently it already costs over $50 just for the train trip each week.  As the people cut down on their waistline, the train would become very popular as a place to check out all the hot bods.   

I’m grateful for the brainwave ideas that me and Leanne achieve on a good bottle of wine.  This idea could also be exported overseas, as there are lots of potential gym bunnies on the trains to Long Island in New York, the Home Counties in the UK and commuters going to and from Tokyo. 

John Howard Cares: Talking to the kids about drugs…

Our household received another pamphlet today.  It was bigger & better than Clover Moore’s “Get Ready Sydney” security pack, so we are well on our way to achieving a very high paper recycling rate in this household for this year. 

I am grateful that Lil Johnny knows so much about our household and talking to my kid about drug issues.  Although there are no kids in this household, I am quite concerned that Thomas (the former drain cat) has developed a drug habit.   So Johnny’s book has a very informative section: “How will you know if your teenager is taking drugs?”:

- A Drop In School Grades: Thomas has not caught any birds in his entire life, and he has failed to catch any cockroaches in the new house - could he be a life long drug user?  I know nothing about his drain-cat street history in Singapore – is it safe to assume he did not get access to hard drugs in Singapore, but then again, maybe he just had good connections!

- A Reduction in Organised Extra-Curricular Activity (such as an unexplained dropping out of sport or other activities or interests):  It has been ages since Thomas has jumped up on the table and knocked over an expensive vase.  He no longer goes over to other people’s houses to pretend that he has not been fed since 1998.

- Bloodshot or glassy eyes:  His eyes always glow in the dark.

- Lethargy or loss of motivation:  Thomas always sleeps from 9am to 5pm (in between feeding times).  Then he goes back to sleep from 6pm to 6am. 

- An unexplained change of friends:  As part of my study diversion techniques, I regularly keep up with Jerry Springer and Oprah on a daily basis.  (It is essential that I keep up with cutting edge social trends).  I am quite concerned, as Thomas used to always avidly follow Oprah, but recently he has been paying more attention to Jerry and the in-depth insights that you get from his shows.  A sure sign that we have issues.

- Unusual or irregular behaviour:  Thomas got really shitty with one of my old work buddies the other night, when he hissed and spat at Jacky, even though he has never met her before…  I originally thought that Jacky may have been part of a cat-haters cult in a past life, but maybe she used to work for a drug enforcement agency. 

- Mood Swings:  Always an issue just before dinner time….

- Minimal interaction with the family:  Thomas’ only interaction involves meowing for food in the morning and evening.  Nothing more.

- Valuable items or money missing:  I always have less money in my wallet on the morning after I go out for drinks in the evening.  I thought I may have been really drunk, but maybe Thomas has been stealing money for drugs.

- Changes in eating patterns:  Thomas wants food 6 or 7 times a day, instead of 4 or 5 times a day when I used to work.

- Agitation, anxiety or jitteriness:  He went ape-shit the other night when I vacuumed the house.

- Sleeping problems, including not sleeping:  This seems to contradict the lethargy issue above.  Maybe Little Johnny has got this wrong…. but he’d never lie to us??? Surely not!!!

- Aggression:  See issues above – particularly at dinner time, or when Jacky ventures into my house.

There is $1.4 billion being spent on these issues by the government.  That’s about $280 per household, so this pamphlet must have been really expensive to produce and distribute.  I’ll make sure I’ll keep in a safe place, along with Clover’s “Get Ready Sydney” pack and Little Johnny’s “Be Alert but not Alarmed” fridge magnet.  I’m so grateful that we live in a nanny state where the pollies care so much….

Monday morning again & I am quitting smoking (again)

Weekend was good, but fairly busy.  Got out in the sunshine yesterday as spring sprang upon us.  After much hounding from a group of good friends, I will shortly reach a milestone in a quest to give up smoking.  About to reach the 24 hour period sometime shortly.  I got some fab chewing gum that gives you the biggest head rush, especially when you are at the gym.  Need to be careful not to crash and burn on the running machine, as that would not be a good look.  Hopefully by writing something in here, I’ll keep to the routine of eating nicotine laced gum.  Maybe I should add my student discount savings to the savings achieved from not buying smokes.  In the words of the Info-Commercial Channel on Foxtel, I will “Save More than I spend”.

Opera savings (student concession) = $49.00, Cigarette savings = $10.  Total to date = $89.40.

I have to give a talk at uni tonight and I should be something to do with ecofeminism and the environment.  That should be interesting.